Wednesday, 30 April 2008

  • Currently Listening
    Brotherhood Creed
    By The Brotherhood Creed
    see related

    Los Cerritos

    I download music and I don’t pay for it.  Regardless of what the music industry thinks (this includes artists, producers, and executives), I don’t consider it stealing.  It’s not stealing because I’m not taking anything physical.  In terms of the science of downloading music, the extent of my knowledge is that a downloaded music file makes a little etch on my hard drive, and I hardly consider that physical property.  Therefore, I’m not stealing anything.  Music industry “experts”, middle-aged Metallica drummers, and non-critical thinkers argue that I am stealing “intellectual property”.  This is a bunch of baloney.  This is akin to saying that Lars Ulrich can sue anyone who overhears one of his conversations, because that person wasn’t given permission to listen to Mr. Ulrich, who obviously has intellectual property coming out of his ears.  And it’s not like I don’t buy CDs or records.  I buy CDs and vinyl because I keep a CD and record collection (not a music collection).  I think that people should pay money if they want a CD collection (and I spend lots of money on my CD collection), but I don’t think people should pay to listen to music.  Listening to music isn’t a crime.  I expect few people to agree with me.  I don’t really care.  I just want to listen to music!

    I recently downloaded a bunch of dance/pop songs from the 1990s.  I don’t really know why I did this.  Though I’ve heard these songs before, I’ve never really listened to any of them.  I was never into dance music, especially when I was a teenager in the 1990s.  Back then I was like every other rebellious kid and listening to what could probably be considered late 20th century emo: hardcore rap.  I also don’t know why, out of all the songs I downloaded (which included music from Snap, Deee-Light, Technotronic, and Planet Soul), I couldn’t stop listening to The Sign by the Swedish pop band Ace of Base.  This song has no historical context for me whatsoever.  I know it came out sometime in the early 1990s, and it may or may not have been popular.  I don’t ever remember listening to this song to any extent back in high school, so there’s no possibility that this could have been one of my favorite songs.  I don’t know why I didn’t like it, or even notice it, back then, because it is a good enough song.  It’s happy and pleasant and makes me want to smile, and that’s probably what compelled me to listen to this song 83 consecutive times on a Sunday morning.    But most of all, it made me nostalgic.  (And interestingly, it made me want to buy cheap, unassembled furniture from gigantic chain furniture stores.)

    On that same afternoon I found myself at my parents’ house in Cerritos, California, which is a small suburban city in southeastern Los Angeles County.  I lived the first 18 years of my life in Cerritos, and my parents still store a lot of my junk in various boxes in the garage and my old bedroom.  My father asked me to move some of the boxes around in the garage to make more room, and I found myself going through my old stuff.  I apparently kept all of my old letters, pictures, cassettes, and other keepsakes from high school, and I sat in the garage and went through everything.  The stuff I found was embarrassing.  I was reminded of all my old heart breaks, and all my silly crushes.  I was reminded of the innocence, and loss of innocence, of high school.  I was reminded that high school was both lame and awesome at the same time.  (One girl consistently addressed me as “Wrex” in her letters, which is both lame and awesome.)  After going through all my old stuff, I couldn’t help but wonder who I used to be and who I am now.

    I once read a quote on the side of a Starbucks coffee cup that said, “You are what you can’t let go of.”  I don’t know who said this, but the fact that it was on a Starbucks coffee cup makes it somewhat valid in terms of postmodern quasi-philosophy.  (This is absolutely true.  You cannot deny the control that Starbucks has on our morality.)  It was hard for me to believe that I was the person I apparently was when I was a teenager.  Who I am today just doesn’t seem like a natural extension of the person from all that junk.  But I suppose that’s all part of growing up.  The biggest realization I had on that day was that it’s easy to not appreciate what you have.  Reading all those letters impressed on me that high school was all about shits and giggles, but I don’t remember it being all that fun.  Maybe I took things for granted.  Maybe I didn’t notice what was around me.  Maybe that’s why I didn’t appreciate great music from Swedish pop bands until 2008.

    I suppose going back home has this affect on most people.  Amidst all my old junk, I took a mental tour around Cerritos.  I thought about riding my bike along Coyote Creek, and watching a football game at Rants Stadium.  I thought about studying at the library, and playing basketball at Liberty Park.  I thought about meeting girls at the mall, and watching a movie at the Towne Center.  It’s surprising how a small town off of the Artesia Freeway has a huge effect on me. It's transcendent how your old hometown can make you realize something new about yourself.

    And on my way home I listened to music that I’d never listened to before.

Comments (12)

  • Ailanna

    I don't regard downloading mp3s as particularly immoral, or any more so than borrowing a CD from a friend or the library.  Most people who download music also buy music, and I have quite a few CDs that I bought after having downloaded all or most of the tracks.


    I have journals going all the way back to age 13.  I'm slightly afraid to look at what's in them.

  • CareyGLY
  • eskirara

    1) Aw, Cerritos!


    2) I go through my boxes once a year, aiming to throw out more and more papers. Most of my collection now consists of essays. I've looked half a dozen times at old notes, and I think I might have actually tossed most of them (not quite sure). But the saying's kind of right. You hold on to the "aw" moments in your life, and you are reminiscent of the times and good days. But in that one moment, you overlook the possibilities of today. So you are (present) what you can't let go of (past). I don't know how many notes I tossed out that day I looked through my things, but I know I'm destined to throw out even more the next round. I also found my old letters from my ex (first love). Aw. I've held onto those because they were the written emotions of another person! How could I do that to them! But... wait... he's an asshole to me now. So, I'm holding on to the writings of a person who no longer exists. There are a lot of bonfires being scheduled this summer, and I thought, maybe.. just maybe.. I'm ready to free the spirit of those notes. Plus I can use that little container for something else, or give it to a little kid who probably has more use for it than I do. Yeah, a little doo-hicky but I believe that stuff exists.


    3) What a great experience for you. That's the stuff.  Thanks for sharing mr. manila!

  • death_by_chocolat

    Ace of Base.  I love them. 

  • oneka

    The Sign by Ace of Base was a big hit in Finland back in the day. I actually owned their CD at the time and I think I still have it stored somewhere.

  • Songs2write

    Last year, I threw away all my old notes that I had saved from high school. It was sad and very liberating. I don't think I've change all too much since then, I'm older and very much wiser...but I'm still lame. I don't mind it. :)  

  • Sangamania

    i will admit that i did love and still do love Ace of Base. I did buy their CD. the only few CD's i ever owned. gosh...

  • sortingandforting

    I definitely recommend this post.

  • helladirl2

    I think the problem is that we benefit from the music and that is consumer satisfaction and that is why you buy such products. However, it is hard to pay for music when it is so readily available for free. I think it is a change in generations. I will usually download the song for free and if I like it and others I will 100% of the time pay for the whole CD. I worked for a musician and he is having problems because of the MP3 thing. The music market has changed. Just like markets do.

    P.s. ace of base. rocks. my . socks. off

  • ThisIsMyCatchyUsername

    I don't 'steal' music because I'm afraid of getting caught and having to pay thousands of dollars.

    Regarding your post on being a creepy stalker: there's this documentary I watched a few months ago called Crazy Love.  It's about this couple who dated shortly in the late 50's before the girl (Linda something) ended the relationship.  After they broke up, the guy (named something Pugach) stalked her constantly.  He would call her all the time, even when she changed her number, he'd stalk her when she went out, threaten her.  When she got engaged to another man, Pugach hired someone to throw lye at her face, blinding her permanently.  Pugach spent 14 years in jail for this.  Somehow Linda came to the realization that he must really love her and once he got out of jail in 1974, they got married. 

    See, u're not the creepiest after all.

  • JL789

    I love music.  It's the Universal language.  :)

  • AdiOpERsOcoM

    I rarely buy music albums too. Last one I bought was $5 from a band named The Small Hours. I wanted to, and I kind of had to since I'm in charge of their fansite anyhow.


    Music is free to me. I download as much as possible. Sometimes I feel guilty of "not supporting my favorite bands" because my boyfriend or other people I know are dedicated fans who actually "donate" their money to [insert band name here].


    Then I remember what my cousin, who is in a band, once told me. He said he doesn't care if he makes money playing gigs, as long as he can do it.


    I figure most artists should have this mentality.

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